Inama ku babyeyi: Ibintu bitatu wakora igihe utishimira inshuti z'abana bawe

Si ngombwa ko ukunda inshuti zose z'umwana wawe gusa igihe kimwe umwana wawe ashobora kuzana inshuti ye mu rugo wumva utishimiye.

Ashobora kuba ari umwana utagira ikinyabupfura, umwana ugaragaza ko azi byose cyangwa ujya gufata ibyo kurya atabisabye.

Ashobora kuba ari n'umwana ukora ibindi bibi birenze ibi, ukumva ko ashobora kwanduza iyo mico umwana wawe.

Biroroshye kubuza umwana umwana wawe kugendana n'inshuti runaka, ariko akenshi ntibikemura ikibazo.

Umujyanama mu myitwarire y'abana Sue Atkins, akaba n'umubyeyi w'abana bane n'umunyarwenya Ria Lina bagaragaje ibintu bitatu byagufasha kubyitwaramo neza utabangamiye umwana wawe.

1. Banza umenya impamvu utabakunda

Ese ni ibintu bikomeye cyane nko kutubaha, urugomo rukabije cyangwa imyitwarire ishobora gushyira umwana wawe mu kaga, cyangwa ni ibintu umwana akora ntubyakire neza gusa, bikurakaza?

Atkins avuga ko ari byiza kubanza ukisuzuma wowe ubwawe mbere yo kugira icyo ukora, ukabanza kumenya gutandukanya ibyakurakaza, bikagutera umujinya ndetse n'imyitwarire yakwangiza umwana.

Niba ubona inshuti y'umwana wawe ifite imyitwarire itari myiza nicyo gihe cyo kureba icyo gukora, ariko niba ikibazo ari nk'imico itari myiza ushobora kubereka urugero rw'imyitwarire wifuza ko bagira.

Ibi ni bimwe mu bintu Lina akunda gukora, aho ubusanzwe asetsa avuga ku buryo bugoye bwo kurera abana bane n'ibyo ahura na byo buri munsi.

Ati: "Iyo umwana ari mu biganza byanjye, akurikiza amategeko yanjye.

"Mbwira abana banjye kutajya bashyira amaguru ku ntebe zo mu modoka, kandi n'iyo hari abandi bana ndi kureberera nabo mbabwira ko batagomba gushyira amaguru ku ntebe."

Lina avuga ko rimwe na rimwe impamvu utakunda inshuti z'abana bawe ari uko biterwa no"guhabana kw'indangagaciro" z'abandi babyeyi.

Ati: "Hari ibihe byageze ntekereza ko, umwana ari kwigisha imico mibi umwana wanjye ariko mu by'ukuri ntibyari amakosa y'umwana.

"Nk'urugero, sinemera imikino ijyanye no kurasana mu rugo, kabone n'iyo yaba ari imikino bari gukoresha intoki cyangwa ibikinisho. Usanga abana benshi b'abahungu babikunda ariko njyewe abanjye ndababuza."

Yagize ati: "Rimwe na rimwe kuganira n'ababyeyi b'undi mwana bishobora kugufasha kubona ibyo mwembi mwakwemeranyaho."

2. Ganira n'umwana, ntugende umubuza.

Ikintu kibi kurusha ibindi ushobora gukora ni ukubuza umwana wawe ngo ntazongere kugendana n'inshuti runaka.

Atkins avuga ko ibyo bituma umwana atumva impamvu uri kumubuza kuba ari kumwe na mugenzi we, kandi ntibituma ahitamo inshuti nziza.

Kuka umwana inabi cyane bishobora gutuma adahinduka nk'uko wabitekerezaga ahubwo agakomeza kugendana n'iyo nshuti kurusha mbere, bikakurakaza.

Icyo ukora ni ukubaza umwana impamvu akunda iyo nshuti ye, ibyo bahuriyeho, n'ibyo bakunda gukorana.

Kumutega amatwi ntibivuze ko wemera ubwo bushuti bwabo, ariko byubaka icyizere hagati yawe nawe.

Atkins yagize ati: "Nimuganira, mutege amatwi utuje. Umenye uburyo bwiza ukoresha umuvugisha ndetse n'uburyo uri kubikoramo kubera ko nugaragaza uburakari cyangwa uri kumucira urubanza, azahita aceceka."

"Urashaka kubaka umubano mwiza nawe, ntago ari ugutandukana."

Lina yongeyeho ko ari "ngombwa kubwira umwana wawe ko hari imyitwarire udakunda ndetse ko udashaka ko ayigana" .

Ubikoze muri ubwo buryo, ntabwo uba uhagaritse ubushuti bwabo cyangwa ngo ubabangamire ahubwo uba ugaragaje ibyo batagomba gusubira cyangwa ngo bemere gukora."

3. Shishikariza umwana kwagura inshuti ze

Niba ubona umwana wawe afite inshuti kandi udakunze uburyo yitwaramo, ushobora kumufasha kwagura umubano we n'abandi.

Atkins yagize ati: "Muhuze n'abandi bana bagire ibikorwa bahuriramo. Umuhuze na babyara be, bose ubahurize nko mu mikino nyuma yo kuva ku ishuri cyangwa ugerageze ibindi bikorwa byatuma ahura n'inshuti nshya."

Ni byiza kandi kuzirikana ko atari buri bushuti bw'abana buhoraho kandi n'abana baca mu bigero bitandukanye, ni byiza rero kwitegereza uko ubushuti bwabo buhindagurika mu gihe cy'ibyumweru cyangwa amezi runaka mbere yuko ubyinjiramo.

Atkins asobanura ati: "Rimwe na rimwe ni inshuti yo mu biruhuko by'impeshyi cyangwa se ni umwana w'umwangavu, ingimbi se ushaka kukugerageza,"

Ikintu cyiza wakora ni ukuberekera ubwoko bw'ubushuti wizeye ko umwana wawe azubaka.

Kubaganiriza ku mubano we bwite byereka umwana wawe icyubahiro, ineza no kumenya aho bagarukira mu mibanire yabo, haba hari amahirwe menshi ko ibyo ubatoje ari byo bigana.